Epilogue:

  After cleaning up the Badlands, Garfield plopped down a Palace of the Gods, just as he’d promised. Its outer wall was approximately a 5 kilometer by 5 kilometer square. Even its inner wall, as well as the main structure, was over 1 kilometer to a side.

  For the time being, Garfield magically summoned a team of 100 people to maintain the palace. He hadn’t calculated that number in any particular manner. He just picked 100 because it’s a nice round number and 10 seemed too small.

  He bequeathed the castle to Hannah and Solana, although he doubted they would spend much time there. At least now, if anything bad happened in the palace, Garfield could blame someone else.

  Brave adventurers and other explorers were pressing south through the Dragon Mountains, attempting to map the Badlands for the first time in recorded history. They noticed dragons flying overhead except, this time, the dragons weren’t attempting to repel the travelers.

  When the explorers reached the Badlands, they were greeted by a desolate wasteland, not that this was unexpected. What did catch them off guard were the small congregations of friendly monsters. The monsters were attempting to establish villages and were surprisingly inviting of the arrivals.

  Also, the monsters were almost all female. Also, some were pretty attractive. In most cases, the adventurers decided to change their top priority from monster extermination to monster studies. A few female adventurers were quite put off by this shift, but the rest of the parties were quite eager to document each type of monster currently residing in the Badlands.

  The Principality Legati made good on their earlier promise and established frequent trade with the Fenwick Kingdom via sea routes off the coast of Tyrin. After all, pirate activity was at an all-time low.

  A western region of the Tribal Lands was flourishing due to increased trade and other relations with the nations to its south, especially Fenwick. For female members of these tribes, the most popular calling was to travel south, primarily to work in a particular type of shop.

  They were even developing a new type of martial art that emphasized disabling the opponent over killing. At first, the cat and rabbit-girls were dominant, but the fox and dog-girls were actually catching up. Relations between the four tribes were at an all-time high, although rumors of their prosperity were spreading east to other tribes.

  The orcs continued their worship of Deathbow but otherwise redirected their efforts from war preparations to education, construction, and other nonviolent pursuits. Gulm eventually returned and was delighted to see his people more interested in learning his craft, albeit only the portions that weren’t darkness incarnate. He didn’t worship Solana as the other orcs did, but he respected Garfield’s party for besting Thoron.

  The dark elves were fretting that their efforts to exert influence in Fenwick and in particular over the powerful Duke Garfield weren’t working. Not only was Eleha showing no signs of cooperating on any underhanded efforts, but the spies they sent to infiltrate Garfield’s shop had stopped communicating entirely.

  At first, they thought the spies had been silenced, but a separate investigation revealed that the spies were continuing to work in the Fenwick Kingdom and appeared perfectly content to stay. Finally, a top dark elf operative actually snuck into Fenwick himself to determine if the spies were under the effect of magic or had otherwise been coerced. The result of his investigation was that no, they had not.

  The dark elf elders were so surprised by this revelation that they got sloppy and let some of the information slip outside their leadership circles. Rumors spread among the dark elves, particularly the young adults, that the group of girls who went missing shortly after the failed assault on the dwarves were actually spies sent to the Fenwick Kingdom who had defected due to the better lifestyles of the west. A few more actually snuck out of their villages to find out for themselves if this was true.

  The dragons had resumed patrolling the mountain range again but were at a loss for what to do. Based on initial scouting efforts, there was no longer a need to defend the mountains from incursions by monsters in the Badlands. Further, the Badlands were no longer a danger to residents from the kingdoms north of the mountains. The mission inherited by the dragons centuries past was apparently over, and the dragons didn’t know what to do with themselves.

  The dwarves continued to focus on making ale and drinking it.

  The elves pursued increasing diplomatic and economic relations with Fenwick. A few of the younger elves even received permission to try visiting Solana’s home. In previous years, such an allowance would have been impossible. With the orcs and dark elves focused elsewhere and Fenwick eager to extend a hand to the elves, the elders felt the time was ripe for new adventures.

  In the Shadow State, construction of a new and improved temple for Col suddenly slowed to a near-halt. His believers didn’t take it well when He personally informed them that He would be living in Garfield’s mansion for a few hundred years and that they could take their time. A few swore to relocate west.

  In the many weeks since Yttria was rescued from the Empire, Emperor Foucault picked up a new hobby. At his command, all of his nation’s spying efforts focused on a single task: keeping track of Hannah’s exploits. His single-minded pursuit of any information surrounding Hannah resulted in him dropping virtually all of his other evil efforts.

  “Garfield.”

  “Pandora! Why don’t you join us for dessert? You’ve met Cardinal Cornwallis I believe?”

  “Oh, him? Yes, I recall him causing you some trouble.”

  “Water under the bridge! He came here personally to warn me about some trouble another Duke is cooking up.”

  “Why would he do that?”

  “You see, apparently a small bit of information about Thoron was passed down secretly in the church for many generations. The Cardinal was elated to hear that I personally eliminated Thoron.”

  “Oh, how nice. What does he think of your new fountain?”

  “Let’s ask him. Cardinal, what do you think?”

  The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

  The Cardinal looked back and forth between Garfield and Pandora, stood up, and rushed out of the room as he shouted, “Duke, please have my dessert sent straight to the Bretten Cathedral!”

  Garfield and Pandora looked at each other and blinked. “You’ve been alive longer than me. Have you ever seen anything quite like that before?”

  “Garfield, just what do you serve for dessert here?” Pandora took a seat and actually sampled the spread. “This isn’t bad. Oh, right, clear the room.”

  Garfield gestured and his remaining staff members departed.

  “Where are the little ones?”

  “That’s a good question! They’re here less and less lately. It’s nice to have some room to breathe, but, I’m kinda worried about what they’re up to…”

  Pandora’s face showed a bit of displeasure. “Can’t you just check on them with your magic?”

  “Nah, I don’t want to do that if I can avoid it. I don’t like how it feels when someone can monitor your every move.” Garfield looked up and let his eyes wander around the room as he said that. He imagined Chrissy somewhere in the house giggling.

  “I don’t mind if that girl hears this, but don’t share it with anyone else.”

  “Okay.”

  “I’m here to pass along a warning to you.”

  “From who?”

  “The Goddess of Love.”

  “Hm. Is this about how I teased Yttria by bringing her onto a ski slope she wasn’t ready for? If so, that’s unnecessary. I was fully prepared to catch Yttria with magic the moment she fell.”

  “It is not,” Pandora replied gravely. “I’ve been warning you for a while now to hurry up and identify the aspect that defines you. If you don’t, you could end up regretting it. I didn’t give you any more specific advice than that because I wasn’t able to predict what end you’re approaching.”

  “Is the Goddess of Love able to make a more accurate prediction?”

  “Precisely. She laid out for me exactly what will happen if you maintain your current course.”

  “Isn’t it bad to find out your future ahead of time?”

  “In this case it’s fine, no, it’s necessary. Frankly, you’ve seduced too many women.”

  “…Excuse me?”

  “You’re impressively oblivious so I’ll explain this as clearly as I can. How do you think you’re perceived in the mortal communities you visit?”

  “I don’t know, but I hardly seduce everyone. My appearance is most decidedly average and unremarkable and I don’t interact directly with enough women to—“

  “Don’t misunderstand, Garfield. Your assessment is based on the standards of your original world. How do you think your grooming and hygiene practices compare to the norm, here? You’re centuries ahead of everyone else. Also, your well-above-average healthy living style, both before and after arriving here, causes you to age better than others.”

  “Okay, I guess I’ll admit I take good care of myself and that gives me a bit of an advantage, but that doesn’t create some type of a looming catastrophe…”

  “You’re simultaneously the irresistible bad boy and the vaunted hero who saves the day over and over again. You possess magical powers that even gods struggle to comprehend. You interact with Us like it’s nothing and even grant us shrines to reside in. Meanwhile, you’re an adventurer who accepts humble missions, an entrepreneur and man of science with futuristic ideas, a top noble who achieved his prestige practically overnight, and a warrior who only loses when you’re hungry for dessert, or so they say.”

  “I’m surprised you didn’t accuse me of bear-shopping.” Garfield recalled the stories he’d heard of men and women getting pet dogs in an attempt to attract partners, i.e., dog-shopping.

  “That too, actually. Your reputation for having a strong affinity for cute animals is definitely a turn-on for some.”

  “Wait, even if I’m more popular than I realize, why is this a problem?”

  “The disruptive effects you’re having on the societies around you are accelerating in scope and reach. You’re at risk of developing an aspect focused on the negative effects you have on the world rather than the positive.”

  “Uh, like, a god who decimates the birth rate by distracting all the women with his charm, leading to societal collapse?”

  “I know you said that in jest, but that’s exactly the type of thing that can happen when your unintended consequences are given a sudden boost of divine weight.”

  “Oh.”

  “I truly don’t think you understand how out of hand this is, and I’m a bit embarrassed I didn’t notice it myself before it was pointed out to me. The Goddess of Love referred to you as a potential second destroyer of worlds.”

  “Well, supposing for a moment I’m going to delay choosing an aspect, how do I prevent catastrophe? Wait, there really was a first destroyer of worlds?”

  “Yes, there was and is. Anyway, if you insist on delaying the inevitable further, I’m not sure how to even reduce the risk.”

  “Can’t I just stop bathing and say lots of sexist stuff from now on?”

  “Garfield you really are attached to the whole mortality thing, aren’t you?”

  “Maybe now that I’m aware of the problem it will be easier to prevent it.”

  “It’s not your only problem.”

  “What now?”

  “You said you didn’t know where your two vampires have been going.”

  “Yes? You know what they’re up to?”

  “Yes. They’ve been training, or studying, or whatever you might call it, under that woman you have running your shop south of here.”

  “Lilah?”

  “Indeed. You may not realize it, but they too are on the cusp of ascending to a higher plane of existence. At a minimum, they could attain a demigod status similar to yourself if they gain any more power.”

  “I figured that was the case, but based on all of Col’s pestering, I thought continuing their development wouldn’t be a big problem.”

  “Don’t go by what Col says. He doesn’t care about the rise and collapse of civilizations. In principle, those two becoming demigods wouldn’t be a problem. She’Sin extracted most of the darkness and negative will out of vampires a long time ago.”

  “Then what’s the issue?”

  “Why do you think they are learning under that woman?”

  “That’s… a good question. I don’t think they’re ready for—“

  “You couldn’t be more wrong.”

  “What!?” Garfield began to sweat as though in his heart he knew where this conversation was going.

  “The elf looks like a young girl but you can’t judge elves like that. They delay their emotional development until they need to become adults. She’s still older than you are. The other one is even older than her.”

  “But Hannah was deprived of interaction for so long that her development seems to have paused at the age that matches her appearance and when she was locked up.”

  “Yes, but you’re forgetting a crucial detail. They’re both vampires. Vampires exposed to communities of adults can develop much more quickly than most normal mortals.”

  “That means…”

  “Hannah is more emotionally mature than she seems, most likely because she enjoys her current relationship with you. The elf simply matches Hannah’s level of maturity. They’re both already at an age where they can fully understand what that woman is teaching them.”

  “That’s kind of alarming, but on the other hand, I still don’t see why this becomes anywhere near as big a deal as the threat I might pose…”

  “Vampires are historically open-minded, promiscuous, and aggressive. You might place limits on what those two can do so they don’t victimize anyone, but what do you think will happen if one or both of them ascend while all their attention is focused on seduction and the like?”

  “I guess they could end up with really weird aspects?”

  “The Goddess of Love had another thought. Since the two are so close, they might somehow pair up and share a combined aspect. Either way, I don’t think you want your dependents throwing the full weight of divinity behind something so—“

  “Okay, I get it! As long as I don’t give them more types of blood, they won’t gain in abilities. That’s enough to ward of this threat for now, right?”

  “I suppose. Don’t expect that solution to work forever, though. There’s a silver lining here, by the way.”

  “What is it?”

  “If they do become some new types of divine temptresses, you won’t be immune either.”

  “How is that a silver lining!?”

  “You’d finally need to choose an aspect.”

  “Christina, are you really moving into the Duke’s place?”

  “Yes, mother. He said my magic would be helpful.”

  “And you’re sure he’s not planning to do anything else like make you his mistress?”

  Chrissy couldn’t tell if her mother considered that a bad thing or not. “No, mother.”

  “Well, all right. What is it you’re looking for, anyway?”

  “I can’t seem to find the item the Duke gave me.”

  “Isn’t that thing dangerous? It hurt you before! What was it called?”

  “The Boom Stick.”