Now free of the non-consensual bondage, Riley surveyed his surroundings. The walls were a medieval stone brick, yet the floor was a crappy navy blue carpet with bits of popcorn stuck in it.

  The jazz had stopped, and Riley found himself looking at rows upon rows of pull-down theater seats filled with massive, vaguely humanoid frogs that just blinked at him. A frog on stage with a mustache and a suit gasped, only to suck in the saxophone they had been playing and prompting other, trombone wielding frogs to pat them on their back.

  Froggy the Chef ribbetted indignantly.

  Froggy‘s tongue shot out, moving to wrap around Riley’s body. It seemed to crawl forward at a pathetic speed, thanks to Riley’s new improved stats. Riley reached out and grabbed the tongue, pulling it towards him. The frog, off balance, stumbled towards Riley, who firmly planted his foot on the frog’s face, ripping the tongue off in a spurt of blood.

  The frog gagged on its own blood, reaching for its throat as it collapsed in a spasming fit. Riley slammed his foot down on the chef’s skull, grinning at the sound of a crunch.

  Leaping atop the corpse of the frog, Riley made a rude gesture, cackling at the frogs. “Let’s go, you sons of bitches—”

  “And that’s how I ended up here,” Riley explained.

  The frog stared at him for a moment before slapping himself in the face with his webbed hands. “That’s how you pissed off the town guard?”

  “Well, I’m still not quite sure how I ended up in this dungeon, but yeah, that’s the gist of it.”

  “What about the part of your story with the system-assigned fairy?” muttered the frog.

  Riley opened his mouth to respond before closing it. He thought for a moment before responding. “I forgot about him. Can you bring him here?”

  The frog groaned again for what was about the seventeenth time in half an hour.

  Riley was currently duct-taped to an office chair, facing towards an upright frog that, curiously enough, was in a strange plague doctor-like getup. When Riley had inquired about it, all he’d gotten in response was “so I don’t get infected with the curse as well.” When pointing out that the frog was a frog, thus the frog was likely infected with the frog curse, the plague doctor had a mental break and collapsed foaming at the mouth.

  And yes, a giant frog in a plague doctor getup that was comically under-sized for it was as funny as you thought it was.

  The frog—whose name was Michael, but that wasn’t important—studied the boy in front of him. Riley seemed completely unrepentant for the atrocities he’d committed. Michael knew that wasn’t exactly some trait of the boy’s species, as he was human, like Michael used—no, as Michael was at the moment.

  Michael had just walked out of his personal clinic to see several giant frogs football piling a young girl. A girl, who continued to use some very crass language and cackle as she broke many froggy noses and bones. A girl that also was a boy.

  “Why did you kill that poor man?” he ribbited mournfully.

  “He was cooking me alive.”

  “That’s no excuse for homicide! Isn’t a chef allowed to have a bit of tomfoolery here and there?”

  Riley groaned. “That’s besides the point. Why did you bring me here?”

  Michael leaned forwards, clasping his webbed hands together. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen another human like myself in these lands. Frankly, there’s such an odd occurrence in this kingdom, I’d almost believe you if you said this was a dungeon!”

  “This is a dungeon.”

  Michael ignored the boy, as if he couldn’t hear him. “The Witch’s Curse that played these lands… I think you’re the key to dispelling it. Which is why I’ll teach you every whit of alchemy and magic I know, in the off chance you can bring this broken world back to peace.”

  Riley blinked. This… was an immense duty being handed off to him. Only he could save these people? This was… this was…

  “Fuck that,” he said, equipping the Funky Axe and bursting out the door.

  Michael sighed, pinching the bridge of his froggy nose. “Guards!” he called.

  genshin cookie run kingdom!!!

  concept of waifus

  we must spread the cross dressing even further through royal road…