Huh!? I'm still oable again... i scream with my entire being pushing behind it. i died. again? I still feel the maggots that were breeding aing my insides from my st death or life. I feel so unfathomably tired from everything, i've learnt how to stop breathing to suffocate myself but it never works. I only lose sciousness, the pain keeps me awake anyhow it's only worked a dozen times. far too little to call it sistent.

  two figures e beside me again, they hold a jug that i feel familiar with i just t remember it at all. they forcefully open my mouth agape and hold the jug by my head and they start to pour. its industrial alcohol are we really doing this again? my fad gullet bee infmed almost immediately. my throat burns and my eyes start to water. the liquid finds itself in my stomad my body gathers all of its might turgitate the poison from my system. but the figures hold my mouth shut, so whehe alcohol and stomach acid travel up my windpipe it sits and pools there making me have swallow it back down. but my body still rejects it and regurgitates it back up. the poison and acid mix find its through my nose and sinuses. my face bees even more infmed as i'm fighting with my body trying to breathe through my nose, every time i fight the poison back down.

  i've been fighting for air for twenty minutes now by having to swallow the poison down. they then bring a glowing red metal ball and plop it in my mouth. my eyes peel back from all the pain, my mouth drys out instantly my body on its st leg goes to try and vomit it out but i force it back down as the metal ball will ighe fuel down in gut. my tongue sears. the smell of cooki goes down my throat and up my nose. but my efforts are futile as the metal burns a hole through my tohat i was using to keep it in my mouth. but it falls down, deg to all my sehat this is it... how i perish from having my gut forcefully pop open. the oxygen ihe room now gets to ighe alcohol again and i start to burn alive as my guts are free to see.

  but as i die, i feel something deep within me ge. it was small but it was on a whole nnitude.

  I have spent what feels like ay screaming and wailing in pain. I now find myself in a test tube but the feeling of fear that radiates my being still lingers. I see two people by a puter. i see the verse with each other but, i faintly see their lips

  "looks like the p- memory and sci- H- been pieced together well. Now all we h- do now give him - muscle memory back - he should be able to piece up t- r- on his own."

  Before i could question what they were saying. pins and needles form all over my body.

  Surge after surge.

  wail after wail

  pain after pain.

  my muscles tract. bones pop and crack. my face distorts as my body brakes apart again. my vision starts to darken but light hits my retina again. i did gehink this was my st time but my hopes would be betrayed again. i wake up, alive...

  i look to my left and i see.. Me?! i, i'm dead. i have never seen myself, so lifeless. there's purple bruising everywhere around my body, my blood slowly infusing the vial with its red tone.

  hahahahhaha, why 't i just die. die die die die die die die... hahahahahaha hy hy hy why. Please someone... anyone... Tell me... i'm scared of having to live.

  what am i

  who am i

  I 't take it

  who?

  what?

  where and how?

  ...

  "well i'm me, aren't I"

  "is that what you think Ats"

  ... i, ah-

  "Why is that so Ats, Tell yourself 'Why' then maybe you'll uand"

  Well why? then tell me why!

  "Ats you have all the answers in your head. Tell yourself why their doing these horrific things to you"

  is it because i'm Ats?

  "It's an answer isn't it? But we're all special aren't we. we all have traits some love but others hate"

  are they trying to get rid of these traits?

  "why ats, tell yourself why"

  well it's because i've been bad?

  "Why, it's an answer isn't it? BUT WHY, ATLAS. you ask yourself all of these questions with nothing. yaining nothing from asking questions. Why, should you have to question yourself. why?

  well if i 't get answers from myself, i'll have to just assume a answer.

  ...

  "Then why are you here Ats?"

  so i kill them.

  "How will you do that"

  I'm going to will it ience

  hahahah i'll do it!!! i'll do it with my bare hands. they will pay.

  their death its assured.

  ill assume myself into a being who is able to seek their utter destru.

  ...

  "hmm seems the mental coursion worked. Missy you'll have t him to the table then we start the infusion with the Zot"

  "What's happening to his Eye doctor"

  "hmmm yes that is strange. I don't really know Missy, its o me, doesn't matter though just bring him to the table all right"

  ...

  "ugh Doctor! he's to heavy for me, i need your help to carry him"

  "hptm Gosh your useless"

  "please don't belittle me doctor"

  "sorry..."

  "hmmm this is strange. he really is heavy. strangely so"

  "is it going to be an issue doctor"

  "it shouldn't be.. i hope"

  ...

  "start putting iterfly needles and start the infusion missy"

  "HUH what's that sound doctor, the arms going off"

  " this isn't very f but we should be fine"

  the room crashes with noise as a group of guards ehe room

  "hahahahahaha! your all going to die. die die die die die die die"

  "What the fuck is he doing awake Doctor! He should be out"

  "Shut up dont tell me what i already know and hold that door shut, you bastard"

  i see his face bubble with sweat, what a beautiful sight to see. I want to revel in this moment forever. i hear the guards scream and bark orders"

  "Hold that door with your life men under no circumstance ats be lost, tih the infusion or the higher ups will have all of our heads. how is the thermal looking son?"

  "it's nearly here"

  "Brace yourself. firearms at the ready!"

  they start putting this strange liquid into my body it's a teal sort of color and it hurts but its all mental. my nerves and senses are being overloaded. I scream in pain, in this very moment. it exceeds all the pain i have ever felt in my entire life. my body doesn't react to it though, but my mind is g at itself trying to process it.

  i hear the faintness scream.

  "Brace yourself men, tih Ats!!!"

  ...

  "I've e to free you Ats"

  he uhe straps holding me down and tio talk.

  "your mind has ged and its fi-"

  I'm Free! i'm actually free.

  hahahahahahahahahaha! my being is free. I stand up and i see this abnormality In front of me. they are a pitch bck silhouette with a very rough outline which tio ge sistently.

  but my senses don't eveer it as there all soaking up this liberating feeling of even being able to stand and thinking about something other than how to deal with pain... i Stand there for hours so i have enough time to y head down from the ecstasy i was feeling before.

  "i'm Free"

  ...