Our first destination was Dad's office. Zenya thought that if there were anyone who would know what happened, and who could tell us, it would be Dad. Maki was too strid closed off to get anything out of her.

  We reached the door, and we heard his voice from inside before my sister could knock.

  “e in.”

  Zenya hesitated momentarily but decided it wasn't worth thinking too hard. We both entered and walked over to Dad's desk.

  His office was quite simir in size to Maki's, but this one was much more decorated, filled with various paintings of epics, legendary heroes, and various types of what looked like beast trophies ad one of the walls. Things that really showed my father's personality and tastes.

  And speaking of him, he was sitting there reviewing dots. There didn't seem to be as many as on Ki's desk, but they did seem much more extensive and important.

  “So, what do you need from me my little princesses?” he said pleasantly, but without taking his eyes off the dots he was w on.

  Zenya stood for a while watg Dad, who seemed pletely impassive, waiting for whatever we were about to tell him. The sileended for a while, as if my sister was waiting for something, but, seeing that nothing was happening, she finally decided to speak.

  “What happeo mother?”

  Dad's hands paused at my sister's ued question but quickly moved again. A certain tension was visible on his face, but his voice tinued in the same geone from earlier.

  “To your mother? I don't know what-”

  “Father, please don't do that.” Zenya interrupted him, her sad voice making him pause, this time a little lohan before, though he soon resumed his as.

  “...”

  There was another long, awkward silen whily the turning of pages could be heard as he diligently read each of the dots then passed them to a revised pile off to the side.

  Zenya remained firmly in pot taking her eyes off our father for a moment, being very patient in waiting for any answer he might give us. I could only g anxiously to my sister's hand. I almost wao scream at Dad, to demand that he tell us what he knew... to firm that this rumor was a lie, but the more time we spent in silehe more anxious I felt.

  “Papi...” I whispered, squeezing my sister's hand tightly. I really couldn't stand the ay of not knowing anything, especially with that horrible idea in my head. Fortunately, that seemed to be enough for Dad to relent.

  “What do you know?” sighed Dad, finally looking up from his work aing the st stack of papers aside, staring at us, still impassive.

  “That mother colpsed this m. And...” Zenya hesitated to tinue, gng sideways at me as if saying anything would provoke some bad rea from me. I looked at her pleadingly, wishing with all my heart that she wouldn't leave that question unasked, as it was what I o know most to calm down...even if it was just a little. “We also heard that she might have only a short time to live.”

  “What?” he replied in fusion and with a frown. “Where did you hear that from?”

  “A pair of maidservants. They were gossiping in the halls.”

  Dad inhaled and then exhaled deeply, looking exasperated. He muttered something I couldn't hear, and apparently, her could my sister. Then he looked at us briefly before leaning ba his chair and being us to e closer.

  We both obeyed, although I ran a somewhat desperate race given how anxious I felt. Dad lifted me into his arms, hugging me against his chest, and, very easily, lifted my sister with one hand and sat her on his p, hugging her against his body as well. Zenya let herself be squeezed a little, and I could hear her exhale with relief. I hadn't thought about it, since she seemed pretty calm, but Zenya might have been just as anxious, if not more so than I was about what was going on with Mom.

  “To crify,” Dad began in a tone I could only describe as fatherly. “Such a thing is just a rumor. A rather malicious-looking one if you ask me. We adults will deal with that ter. But, that's for us.”

  Both Zenya and I exhale in relief. I knew he might be telling us that to reassure us, but I could sense he was sincere.

  “Now,” he tinued immediately. “Your mother indeed had a little i in the m, but it's nothing to worry about.” Dad moved his right arm, with which he was hugging Zenya, and pulled out his pocket watch, then nodded slightly and tinued. “She should have woken up by now so why don't you both go see her? She should be in the green room on the sed floor.”

  Green room? What the hell is that room?

  “... we?” asked Zenya a little hesitantly.

  Dad ughed lightly and held her closer to him more tightly as he stroked her head a little. He gave us both a kiss on our heads before setting us down again.

  “Sure, you . But! You must promise me something first!” He announced, leaning a little towards us as we nodded in unison.

  “Fiana is probably there right now, so if she asks you how you found out, I didn't tell you anything, uand?”

  “Why?” I asked, not quite uanding the request. But my question was ignored and answered by my sister's words.

  “Dad... Maki made you promise not to tell us anything?”

  He nodded giving a tired sigh. “That's why I need you both to promise me that. I didn't tell you anything, which is teically true. And if she asks you if you came here...”

  Zenya rolled her eyes with a small smile on her lips. “You were too busy at your jht?”

  “Hahahahaha! That's my girl.” Dad patted us both on the head, a little too hard I have to admit, and tousled my well-groomed hair... then urged us to leave, as he still had plenty of work to do.

  Zenya took me by the hand and we headed for the dether, but before we were out the door, Dad spoke again.

  “Oh, and before you go, Zenya, don't fet the faces of those maids, I'm going to need you to remember them so I ...have a versation with them.” He said, with a half-smile on his lips.

  “...Uood father,” Zenya replied, giving a slight bow while making a frighteningly simir expression.

  Finally, we left his offid headed to the sed floor.

  The green room is a room near where we had kept Ameli while she was rec. Apparently this whole wing on the sed floor could be sidered a sort of infirmary, sihe family physi and some nurses were assigo this pce.

  By ce; or even thanks to Dad's timing in pointing out the pce, when we reached the hallway where that room was, we saw the physi ing out of there along with Maki, while exging a few words. When they finished, she turned and saw us ing. She frowned, closed her eyes, and sighed in exasperation, before approag us both.

  “Good m, girls, what brings you-”

  “Where is Mother?” Zenya interrupted Maki in the middle of her question. I hadn't expected her to do that, but I wouldn't bme her.

  “...” Ki didn't answer and just looked at us, annoyed. She seemed about to sy sister rather fiercely, but trary to what I thought, she inhaled deeply and her expression rexed. “I guess it wasn't your father who told you what happened, am I wrong?”

  We shook our heads, and Zenya told her what we heard from those maids. Maki narrowed her eyes after hearing the brief description of both maids. “Yes, I know who they are. They mentioned Kemasa, didn't they? Well, don't worry about it, I'll take care of them ter.”

  “Ki...” I called her quietly, feeling a little anxious. Ki and Dad had dehe rumor, other than telling us that we should ignore such things, but that didn't remove my for my mother's current state. I clutched at her skirt to get her attention and, giving me a worried look, she took me in her arms.

  “It's okay, I uand. I didn't expect this to be kept a secret for too long anyway. Let's go inside, Lana's awake now and it would be good for her to see you both.”

  That said, we went inside and the first thing I saw was Mom sitting on the bed reading a book as if nothing had happened. She looked pretty healthy even though she was supposed to have colpsed a couple of ho.

  I felt scammed but also relieved.

  She was sitting there, smiling slightly and without a care in the world, reading so calmly that it almost seemed as if she wasn't in a room that looked more like an infirmary than anything else.

  Just looking around a bit revealed why they called it the green room.

  Green tapestries, with a carpet of the same shade. The windows had curtains in a slightly darker shade of green. Even the bed sheets were a shade of green. The only thing that wasn't that color was the furniture which varied between shades of brown and white, somewhat giving a feeling of being in a forest rather than a room in a mansion. Although some bookshelves and various tubes and bottles that looked like potions, pletely cut through the ambiance, and made it feel more like the home of an alchemist hermit.

  “Lana. The girls.” Ki announced sloroag Mom, as she closed the door behind us.

  My mother turned her attention away from her book and smiled at the sight of us, but just as she opened her mouth to speak, my sister ran towards Mom, ung herself onto the bed and nding carelessly on top of her. She immediately g to her body with no iion of letting go.

  “Are you okay?” was her simple question, posed in a timid voice apanied by a soft sob.

  Mom, who had been a bit stunned by Zenya's ued a, and subsequent question, hugged her gently, and in a firm but motherly tone replied, “Of course, honey. Mommy's just a little tired, that's all.”

  “...Really?” Zenya didn't move, even hugged her a little tighter.

  “I promise. It's nothing to worry about.” She replied kissing her on the head, and cradlio her chest.

  My sister nodded and fell silent. I mentioned earlier I noticed that perhaps Zenya could be just as or even more anxious than I was, and this had been demonstrated to me very clearly. Because of her calm, cheerful, aermined nature, it was easy tet that she was just a child, A girl who loved and cared very much for her family.

  Mom moved her gaze toward us and beed Ki to e closer. Without dey, Maki walked over to the bed and, pulling up a nearby chair, sat beside Mom with me still in her arms.

  “Were you worried too my baby?”

  I nodded a her hand caress my cheek, a warmth that soothed me and gradually removed all traces of ahat had built up so far. I enjoyed her toutil my sister finally emerged from between Mom's chest. Her face looked a little funny, with messy hair, slightly puffy eyes, and her left cheek, a mark from the fabriom's nightgown. I almost felt the urge to ugh aloud, but I mao restrain myself, which Ki could not do.

  “You look...pff.”

  Mom joined her in ughter as she wiped away the few tears left on her face, which was now a bit flushed with embarrassment.

  “Maki!” retorted Zenya, puffing out her cheeks and looking away. It was difficult not to ugh, but I mao hold myself together. I could imagine what was happening in my sister's mind.

  Passio my mother's arms, Ki took advantage of the moment to tinue pying with my sister, lightening the mood and transf it into something more rexed. Although I was still worried about Mom, her current ugh and attitude seemed to reflect a person who had not at all colpsed and was unscious and bedridden.

  At least for now, it didn't seem like I should think too much about it.

  “By the way,” Mom said, attrag everyone's attention. “You told me a letter had arrived from Anven, right, what news did it bring?”

  “Ah, nothing too important really,” Ki replied as she slowly rejoined Zenya who seemed somewhat exhausted from ughing so hard. “A little greeting, her current situation, and aimate of her return.”

  “And when would that be?”

  “In about 4 years. Much soohan I expected.”

  “That's true. I had expected her to return in at least another 8 years.” Mom nodded, agreeing with Ki. Then she asked with curiosity in her voice. “Are you going to send her any response?”

  Ki shook her head and gnced questioningly at my sister and me. Zenya, like a good big sister, took the initiative to respond.

  “The letter is fiya took care of writing most of it, I just added a few more plicated details.” Replied my sister puffing out her chest with pride.

  “Really? Just as expected from my little baby.” Mom ed her arms around me in a warm embrace as she tio shower me with praise.

  We spent the rest of the afternoon chatting about how much I had learned so far and my writing/reading abilities. By the time dinner arrived, Zenya took me to the dining room while Ki and Mom stayed in the bedroom. As Ki said, Mom was to stay in bed for at least a couple of days, to make sure she fully regairength. With that said, my sister and I left.

  “Are you sure you don't want to tell them anything?” I asked worriedly. Fia is not oo keep this kind of thing from the family, especially with how the girls reacted, but I could also uand that she didn't want to worry them too much more. Even I was a little worried too.

  “It's best to keep it that way for a while, no need for both of them to worry unnecessarily. Besides, just like the physi said, it's not such a big deal. You just o be more careful a more rest.” My beautiful lover Theriant came over to the bed and sat down, allowio stroke her soft pointed ears, something she usually does when she sees me w or fidgeting.

  “I assure you I'm getting plenty of rest,” I said, rolling my eyes as I pinched one of her cheeks. “This time it was just... an ued i.”

  “Ued i... you look me in the eye and say the same thing if I told you I know what you've been doing behind my back?” Fiana turned her head slightly, giving me one of her inquisitive looks, that she always gives me when she knows more than she pretends.

  I avoided her gaze, feeling a tinge of guilt inside me.

  “...”

  “Irna.” She uttered my name, not angrily but sadly, adding to my guilt. “Does Hal know?” she asked, slowly standing up and looking directly at me.

  “...From the beginning, yes.”

  Fia exhaled in exasperation, pulling her eyebrows together in a clear expression of anger. “And when did you think...? Fet it, what have you been doing?”

  “We found a possible treatment for my illness.” I sighed sadly, resting my head on her shoulder. If she had already figured me out, I might tell her everything. “Hal was the oh the idea, he told me he had found an alchemist physi who was researg heart disease, and that, after reviewing his research, he decided it would be worth a try.”

  When we lost Kalenia, I stopped trusting any medication, treatment, or anything made by alchemists. But, since my illness was discovered, the options had been quickly running out.

  “How effective has it been?”

  “Not as much as I would like, but that was among the expectations. Acc to Cloyr, the alchemist. He said that during the early stages of treatment, I would feel weak, sleep less, and might eventually have these kinds of breakdowns, but he assured us that this would be normal and to be expected.” I was still doubtful, though. It was unthinkable that there would be a medication that caused the disease to get worse so that it could be cured. But, despite that, there was something that drove me to tinue. A hope that I could recover.

  No matter how much I wao pretend, I was terrified that one day, out of nowhere, I would suffer a heart attack of some kind that would lead me straight to the domain of the Holy Mother. I couldn't let something like that happen before I witnessed my you daughters grow up. So, I decided to put aside my mistrust and at least try.

  “But I've seen almost no ge. It's being hard to hold on to that little hope.” Fiana hugged me tightly and was silent for a while. I could tell how deeply she was thinking by watg her tail curl around my arms, something she always does unsciously, with me and our daughters. Seeing that made me smile.

  “Okay, I get it, I won't say anything more about it.” He finally said “But, Lana, I'm starting to get very upset that you two keep keeping things this important from me. Don't I deserve to know about these things too?”

  “...I'm sorry. That was my fault. I... I didn't want to give false hope until I'd seen some improvement.”

  “Save those lies for someone else, Irna,” She growled as she pushed me away and looked me with anger. “Tell me the real reason.”

  I looked down, hoping my words would have been enough, but I uimated her insight too much. I tried futilely to lean on her in an attempt to hit her ot, but a light squeeze on my shoulders, kept me an arm's length away and her unged expression told me there was no way around it. My vah began to fidget nervously behind me, something that did not go unnoticed by her.

  I took a deep breath and unicated my s to her.

  “Even though this ‘’medie‘’ may e to alleviate, or even cure to some extent my illness, albeit in the long term, Cloyr also stressed the fact that there is a siderable ce of ending up... iile.”

  Fiana frowhoughtfully. She seemed fused by my words. Of course, I could uand, at this point, why would I care about not being able to have more children? Trying could very well kill me. The problem wasn't iher or not I could get pregnant.

  “Why would that be a problem? That wasn't supposed to be a possibility anymore.”

  I shook my head, knowing it would be a difficult versation to have with her. “It's not me I'm worried about, Fia.”

  It took her a few seds, but she finally realized what I was referring to.

  “Me? But...”

  “No, it's not something that would affect you. At least not directly.” I sighed, trying to find a way to expin to her what I had been trying to do for the past few years. It would be something that could either destroy her trust in me or...

  I took a deep breath, trying to muster up the ce to say what had worried me the most during this ereatment. “Fia, if this medication renders me iile, it's not just my ability to get pregnant... so is the only ce we have a child together.”

  Fiana looked at me with her eyes wide like ptes, frozen in pce, pletely dumbfounded. “You... you were...”

  I nodded, firming what was on her mind. Fia covered her mouth with her hand in disbelief. I could almost tell her mind was w at full speed, trying to assimite what I had just told her.

  “Is that why...?”

  I nodded again, avoiding her gaze. It was hard to admit to my Maki that I had been “sowing my seed” carelessly. Normally that wasn't a problem for her, sihere are ways to avoid pregnancy, but she didn't know that I wasn't using any of those methods. After all, the odds that I could get her pregnant were so low that it was easy to ignore something like that.

  I saw various emotions pass across her face, from disappoio even a glimmer of hope, which is why I had been doing it all this time.

  “Since when?” she asked after cluding her mind.

  “A year after you recovered. I had a small hope that the Holy Mother would grant us her mercy after all we went through.”

  “And you didn't tell me because you thought I might object or even bme you.” I her assertion. She started massagiemples, looking less ahan I was expeg. I thought she would yell at me.

  “I'm sorry, for keeping it from you, I-”

  “It's okay. I think I uand why you did it. It doesn't erase the fact that, once again, you've been keeping things from me, but just this once I uand.” The tired look she gave me was not a pleasant sight to receive, but I knew her well enough to know that no rancor was in her eyes. Unfortunately, that didn't take away the weight in my heart for what I had done.

  This time, without her pushing me away, I mao hug her tightly, a form of apology for what I did.

  “It's okay honey, I know you didn't mean it, I just...I'm afraid it will all happen again.”

  “I'm scared too, but, despite everything, even though there is that possibility, I still want us to be able to ceive. It's a thorn that has been stu my heart from the beginning and I 't help but want it.”

  Fiana didn't respond, merely hugging me a little tighter. For a while, we stayed like that, sharing a few kisses and gradually reg. I told her more about the medie: when I had to take it and about the person who delivered it every week. After that, she went out to get our dinner.

  I y ba the bed, refleg on what I had said and done. I took my vah in my hands and prayed with all my might to Alika, Mara, Numa, and the twin Pilrs Erka and Erias. I prayed early that, even if the possibility were slim, we would finally be grahis selfish wish of ours.

  Shortly thereafter Fia returned with my dinner, hers, and a couple of adorable little girls who seemed unwilling to leave my side for the rest of the day. We had dinner and had a beautiful time. Whatever fate was in store for me, I at least wao be able to see my daughters reach adulthood.

  FivesZeta