Have I heard what I think I have? Surely not.
But those words I heard… were definitely hers.
So, that’s it. The missing piece of the puzzle. The switch.
The switch I sensed was turned off. Oh, the irony of destiny! It was Ayumi herself who had turned off the switch!
Despite the oppressive, black sky filling my field of view, I felt enlightened.
Everything strange about Ayumi during the last week came rushing back to me. That single piece of information was enough to turn the gears in my head again, now working at full speed.
Now it all makes absolute sense.
It’s so obvious! It hurts to even think I didn’t figure it out myself.
I only woke from my trance when I suddenly felt delicate hands wrapping around my back. A distinct sweet scent from her unkempt hair overcame my senses.
“A-Ayumi?”
“Sorry, Takkun. Let me enjoy this moment for a little bit, okay? After all, it’s the last time I’ll be able to.”
I looked down at her. Ayumi’s face was flush and stuck in a chaotic mess of blissful and sorrow. Her emerald eyes fixated on me for just a single moment, shining due to the moist forming in the corners. They drew me in like they never had before. As soon as she noticed my staring, she hid her gaze from me.
Her voice, muffled by my shirt, was almost inaudible. “Gosh, this is kinda embarrassing.”
At that moment, I understood.
Her eyes. Those eyes I hate and love so much. The reason why the other Ayumi doesn’t have those eyes came to me just then, like lightning.
It wasn’t because she found fleeting interest in something. The answer was much simpler.
Those eyes were for me.
Every time I saw them, it was Ayumi’s love pouring out.
It was so lame now that I realized it. I should have figured this out ages ago because the time to relish them had already gone.
Man. What is with this ridiculous situation? The person closest to me right now is still, and will soon be, the one that’s the furthest away. She will disappear, leaving behind a mere shadow of her former self. I’ll never see these beautiful eyes again.
I wanted to say something, but nothing came to mind.
I just wanted to keep her there longer. Forever.
I mean, put yourself in my situation. My childhood friend is in my arms and just confessed to me. I wanted some time to enjoy this. Time I didn’t have.
Damn it.
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
Ayumi shut the pitiful attempts of vocalizing my absence of thoughts by placing her finger against my lips. “Takkun, you don’t need to say anything.”
“But—”
“You don’t need to carry this burden. In a few minutes, it will be like it never existed.”
Hearing this, I pushed Ayumi back and stared directly into her eyes.
“What do you mean, Ayumi?”
She took her gaze off mine. “This incident, everything that has happened only involves Divers and angels. It doesn't concern you, Takkun. Like every other human, your memory is also going to be reset alongside Gaia. Just like it was meant to be since we first confronted Shiina. Angels, the Upper Realm, the simulation… All of that knowledge will vanish from your mind. Your life will continue just like it was supposed to a month ago.”
Ayumi’s words hit me like a hammer falling on a glass ceiling.
I’ll forget all of this.
All the adventures we had together, these two angels, the truth of the world… Ayumi's confession.
Just like the angels were lied to their entire lives, so too will I be lied to for the rest of my life. Returning to the dark once more.
But more importantly than that…
A second, two seconds, three seconds of silence passed. It felt like my vocal cords were glued shut. I had to force my voice out and what came out was horridly hoarse.
“I can’t accept that.”
Hearing this, the girl in my arms looked me in the eyes once more.
“I’m not fine with losing all these memories. It’s not about the truth of the world or whatever. Screw all that. I will lose something much more important than the knowledge of angels.
“I’ll lose you again, Ayumi. You cannot imagine how stressed out I was during the last week. I don’t ever want that to happen again. I want to remember this moment forever. Because, for the first time in eight years, I feel like I know you. Truly you, no ifs, ands, or buts.”
Then, I finally said it.
The fact that had been haunting me for years, that I refused to accept whole-heartedly.
The fact that Ayumi’s parents helped me realize, even eight years after their passing.
“I can’t lose the girl I love again.”
Hearing my confession, Ayumi lowered her gaze and hid her face in my shirt. This time, it wasn’t because it was difficult to say what she wanted.
It was because if she did say it, she’d start crying.
Instead, she murmured in a thin voice, “You're so lucky I have these special permissions. Imagine what my parents would say if they knew what I’m about to do.”
Then she asked a simple question, still hiding her eyes. A question so simple, yet one that carried tremendous implications.
“Are you sure you want this burden… this curse?”
“Yes.”
“For the rest of your life, you’ll know the truth. You’ll be trapped by it, feel miserable because of it, and not be able to speak with anyone about it. You’ll be more alone than anyone in the world.”
“I’m fine with that.”
“You’ll have to take care of my proxy too. Despite looking like me, she won’t know anything. You won’t be able to share this experience with her. You… won’t be able to share your love with her. Are you prepared for that?”
“Yes…”
I heard a soft sob. Ayumi faced up again, large tears tumbled from her eyes, running down her cheeks.
“Okay. I will grant your selfish request. In return, will you allow one of mine? There’s one last thing I want to do before I leave without any regrets.”
She didn’t give me time to answer.
Ayumi kissed me.
How did this girl, with her tiny stature, her permanently messy hair held by a single useless hairpin, and those mysterious emerald eyes manage to reach my lips with her own?
Maybe she floated. She had unlocked some crazy powers, so it wouldn't be out of the question to think she could have done it.
Maybe she had help from someone or something I couldn’t see.
Or maybe I had underestimated her stretching abilities.
Of course, none of this passed by my mind at that moment.
Nothing did.
After some amount of time, an amount I cannot calculate, I fainted for the last time.
And at that moment, my adventure was over.